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Back to Search ResultsIntroduction
This is a (near enough) small yet simple guide on how to become a model community member in most if not every community board online.
This is not rocket science, and will only teach you the fundamentals of forum etiquette and behavioural techniques needed to enable you to get what you need from a community on the internet and be popular online at the same time!
Most of the techniques written can be translated into real world strategies aswell, don't constrain yourself to the boundaries of the inter global realm of the internet my child!
Character Building
Background
To every task there is always some background work to be done and personally noted about before you dive in and get going, this goes for most interactions.
The key to having a good background is in planning routines to achieving what you need to know and how you need to get it.
If (for example) you are part of a
and you want to become a respected member that gets promotions to high ranks, the first thing you would need to break down is what you need to become respected.
In this example we would clearly need to be seen as a good game player and a good battle coordinator to gain respect and rank within that community.
There is a more to it, but the simple fact is to break down the actions in the overall task and plan various situation outcomes ahead so you are able to carry off the act without a hitch.
Social engineering is an art form and like every art form, the more you know about the subject matter, the better your understanding of what is involved to achieve success.
Keeping all that in mind, try to understand that what I'm explaining, you already have naturally in you -- its just not something you may not think about and break down in your head about as much as maybe I do, but it's certainly nothing new to your subconscious conversational patterns.
Communicating
There are many ways to engage fellow human beings, they are always willing to tell you something!
What they will say to you and how they react is really dependant on some key variables:
*Approach.
*Attitude.
*Attributes.
... With the simple triple A conversing theory, just these three variables can be gently manipulated to have some control over how a conversation will pan out.
Notice these are only a very select few behavioural techniques that we are looking at, and I'm not going into much depth here because there are so many styles and variables that could also work well or render the same effect, but to be honest you will pick them up and learn your own style better without me confusing you, and for the sake of readability I am trying to keep this as small a guide as possible (lol).
...But I shall enlighten you a little on the triple A theory at least...
Approaching
The way you approach someone either online or in the real world is highly important, in fact it is so important that it was the first one I listed up there and the first key variable that should enter your head when establishing social interaction with humans!
Your image, and the picture you paint of yourself in the first fifteen seconds of meeting or communicating with someone will play a big part on how you are treated whilst communicating with the individual or group -- but, and here's the good news -- your image can and does 'shift' if you are smart and have conversational control over the audience to whom you communicate with, which will give you a good chance to recover if you started out bad. Please note that it takes experience and a quick wit to pull off a 'shift' so epic that it would have wiped the first impressions you initially gave, so I suggest you try to get it right the first time.
Background helps you greatly with approach, and you won't be the best you could be if you don't study your background well.
Attitude
Your attitude towards a situation and the people to whom you communicate with, or about, will either work for you or against you depending on your situation and character awareness.
This variable is mostly judged through facial and bodily expressions, which will probably make you think that this is a fairly easy variable because you're using it on the internet, but I guarantee it's more tricky than you think, as online it is judged more on how the target perceives you overall on the impression you gave on the approach, coupled with your background.
Mastering your approach to the situation will help you maintain the correct attitude, thus complementing the initial background percived by the target.
Attributes
Your attributes here are really things such as the type of character you are, and general commonality the target perceives you both share. This is not as important as the other two are, but without the correct use in attributes you won't be fully authentic and authenticity builds onto trust -- and as we all know, trust is a big thing!
Attributes can be easily manipulated to your advantage, sometimes without knowing it many people devise stories of how their day's been, what they own, who they slept with, and so on and so forth...
Fact is, it's there as a form of ice breaker that humans tend to warm to when 'small-talking' with other humans trying to bond with each other.
Coupling all three of these key variables and using my triple A theory to compliment and progress your own style will bring you success in acquiring the information or material you need socially through being able to identify and manipulate some key aspects in conversational situations, but you will need to know alot more than this to fully authenticate to the target person or group. Which brings me nicely to...
Trust
When humans bond they form a mutual understanding which then develops into a strong
based on trust.
Trust takes many forms and is best viewed and broken down in stages
Soul Mates
The fact is that this level of bond is extremely rare and never consciously granted on the first encounter, although if you are lucky you may develop a mutual respect with the target which could speed up the process of the trust ladder a lot quicker.
New Friend
At this level your target is not subconsciously judging your behaviour as much as the previous trust stage. Although they are still looking for more understanding of your character background so it's important you still stick to your routine.
Mutual Respect
This stage relies heavily on character understanding and background commonality. It's vital that you maintain a strict routine and always have a good communicational bond with the target, without giving up too much information about deep personal issues.
Remember that you will only progress once you have correctly mastered both your character background and your communicational routines to your style.
Never try to rush the trust ladder, it's the most scrutinized emotion in humans and is always best to allow a natural coarse for it to develop. If you try too hard it will be noticed and you will epically fail on a monumental scale!
Chapter Summary
In this chapter we have touched lightly on some key variables that will combine together to build on both your personal style and your character background.
In the next chapter we shall be touching on how to make an impact and becoming popular online. Find out how and why a large social
can make you money, plus lots more still to come!
